I’m gonna write this in English, because I want the person involved in these thoughts to be able to read them.
When I returned from the trip to Powergirl some weeks ago, I was in the ICE, having a bad mood, wanting to look like I’m reading to anyone watching (including me) while really thinking and feeling miserable.
To accomplish that goal, I sat in this area in the ICE, where they try to make a soft trangsgression from 1st to 2nd class – there’s one cabin where you have the wood displays, the carpet and the privacy of 1st class, but it really isn’t. That look alone scares many people away, if you add a grumpy young man reading a book, most people will walk on by.
She didn’t. She asked with a look in her eyes if the cabin I was in was open for her company, and, well, yes it was. So she came in, and I actually still wanted to read my book, and mopst definitely did not want any train smalltalk.
Still, we talked a bit, where we were, and where we were going, and she was very nice, so I asked her if there was any language she would prefer to German, maybe, because she spoke with an accent and was searching for words every once again. She answered with a reliefed smile “Oh, yes… English? Francais? Italiano?”
And there she had me, really… (a) speaking languages, (b) one of them being Italian… So we did chat a bit (because in Italian, my skills won’t bring me further than chitchat), and when we ran out of things to say in Italian, we switched to Englisch. At that point we had left smalltalk behind us and had found common interests. She want to know more about psychology, I wanted to know more about Ballet (there she had me again…).
We had a very nice ride for an hour or so, and then she went. I was raised never to be presumpteous, and, too, I’m a coward, so she had to ask for trading contacts.
Today, we met in Bielefeld, and although I was nervous, I was looking forward to it.
We talked about love (of course), and life, and how they interact, and I told her of how I have found the concept of Nakedness to be SO important for good living as well as good loving, and she agreed. We found trails of that concept in good acting, and in a song I’m writing right now, and just about anywhere. We talked about how hard it is to be naked with people, but how very much it makes you feel “right”, too.
She also came up with another concept, that might be equally important: Growth. And this does not mean to constantly strive for something, not being happy till having reached it, but, contrarily, to enjoy the striving, to love the growing as it is. This is somehow related to Nakedness, because there you try to be as you are, while in Growing you try to become more; but you’re still naked. So you have to cherish yourself (and every other person) for the unperfect being you are, but as well try to work on you.
We also spoke about “soulmates”, a concept I pretty strongly disagree with. She, on the other hand, believes in the one right partner out there, although she doesn’t believe that this partnerships need to be lasting to be “real”. I tried to really, really understand what she means by that, and through this we arrived at “soul moments”.
Because, the feeling your “soulmate” gives you is ultimately your own: You feel good because he is what he is, or rather, because you can be what you are, when you’re with your “soulmate”.
I said I know that feeling, but I don’t localize it in a person.
For me this feeling of being totally congruent with what you’re meant to be, of just being human, totally near to yourself (thus, being naked) happens once in a while, and it is what I would call a “soul moment”.
We could agree on this, because, naturally, if there is a person you often experience soul moments with, it’s a pretty good idea to spend a lot of time with them.
Wieder was gelernt…